/// 9/09/2010 11:13:00 PM
really dont know what shall i start. maybe going to close down my blog soon. blog is dying and noone visiting my blog le. tagboard is dying too...lol
maybe this shall be my last blog post.opps
was very busying with my stuff nowaday.
just want everything to be allright.
YESTERDAY
seriously thought was over. i only sad over i cant go thailand and that all. i really very upset. i always say "u all can go thailand". i know i wrong but i saying in a joking way afterall. dont treat it seriously. i am really upset about cant go thailand. and that all.
i cant convince my daddy at all . nomatter how much i say but i just cant go.it my communciation with daddy..my relationship with daddy is worse . he wont listen to me even i say very nicely. my daddy is like that. please understand why i react like that . i realised it hard to commuciate with ppl nowaday. i losing my confidence to talk to ppl. maybe my way of talking is really wrong. sorry about it.
TODAY
after chatting with them about it. i feel better somehow. thanks girls. i know thing will always happen becoz of my tone. sometime i really hate myself becoz of it. tone that make ppl feel sad, stress up, feeling guilty. please dont misunderstand it by my tone. it really is like that le. i am not meaning what u all thinking. but i know u will say my tone have prove it. ya maybe u all are right. but it not what i meaning. i am sorry if i let u feel that way. i thankful for the chat that make me burst and feeling better. ya seriously, i do scared ppl walk away. it not the first time anymore. i know it yours way. but do please sit down calmly and talk to me in patiently .i may not understand once but i will understand slowly. i really dont want it to happen again. i am tired too.sometime it really break me down. friends are mean like a family to me . a single words/reaction that make me feel sad. i dont want to be sensitive and emotional one anymore.
no more thing is going to happen anymore. if it happen, maybe i will choose to give up suddenly on myself and choose to close up myself.
i am so sorry about typing " in my world, there no " true friends' . sometime i do feel it. but i know there some somewhere.
thanks alot for the chat girls! do appreciated.
Amanda♥